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It is hot here. I know that it’s not 100 degrees with 99 percent humidity like it can be in Texas, but it is remarkably warm here. It usually gets down into the fifties at night. Guess what? It is 67 now at 1am. WTF? I moved to CA so I wouldn’t have to deal with the heat and humidity. I know, I know, tiny violin. Seriously though, we don’t have AC. It’s fine now, but this afternoon it sucked. How did our ancestors do it? That is, survive the elements without roasting to death. I would have given up, laid down, and waited for coyotes to come devour my carcass. One of my tens of brothers or sisters who didn’t die at childbirth would have had to carry on the family legacy for me.

Tomorrow, I’m wearing shorts to work. Ooohhh, rebellion! What can I say? I’m just a tax-paying, speed-limit-driving, decaf-coffee-drinking wild child.

Okay, I’m not literally an old man, but I am a bit crochety. Today, I went into the breakroom and the newspaper that is usually spread out across two tables was missing. I had gone and picked up lunch with the intention of eating out on the patio while thumbing through the business and lifestyle sections of the newspaper. Now what was I going to do? I couldn’t sit outside and eat my sandwich alone, like a loser. I had to at least look like I was doing something. Plus, I LIKE to read when I’m eating lunch, preferring articles in ten paragraphs or less.

Not being able to get over my “news needs,” I went back inside and pulled up a few articles on the online paper. And printed them. I am a nerd and an old man who just wants his daily news and his turkey sandwich with NO pickles Goddamnit!

Well, the happy sunshine theme from earlier has changed over the last few hours. For some reason tonight, I just felt really really moody and anxious. It could be PMS or it could be my anxiousness at not knowing exactly what will happen this summer. I think everything will go smoothly, but for right now, I’m waiting. I feel bad because I hung out with some good friends tonight and I felt unhappy. They are really cool people, but I just didn’t feel right. Maybe it is PMS. Maybe I’m still bummed that my coworker got canned. Maybe I’m just grouchy for no reason. Anyway, the point is that I’m anxious and moody and it isn’t just going away. Exercise usually helps, but I don’t feel like doing yoga or going for a walk right now. I feel like drinking. Hmmmm…to be continued.

So, I made good on my promise to myself that I will go to the gym at least once this weekend, or this week for that matter. I like going anytime between Thursday and Sunday because the gym is less crowded on these days and I can actually use all of the machines I like without lurking in the background while some poor sap feels my eyes burning through him as I count the minutes he’s been hogging a machine.

Anyway….

Tonight, I did weights. The gym was even quieter than usual. I started out working on my upper body, but I swapped out with some lower body machines to give my arms a rest. I kept my eye on my favorite machine, but it was always in use. Finally, I decided that I would hit it last. It gives my lower back a great workout and it’s nice to stretch immediately following this machine. I went over to it, but there was a group of three people standing around it, leaning on it, and using it for a minute at a time before resuming their conversation and using another nearby machine. I was going to give up when I noticed that they seemed to be focused on an adjacent machine. Since my workout is usually brief, two sets of twenty, I figured I could be done in about four minutes. I walked over and started to get on it, when one of the women smilingly said “Oh, sorry. We’re using that in rotation.” WTF? You’re either using it or your not. You cannot call dibs on a machine you’re not actually using. I was pissed but I smiled and got up. I went to get a sip of water and busy myself in the hopes that they would move to another group of machines to hoard, but they kept with their “rotation” for a while. Finally, I gave up and went and stretched out before leaving. As I was walking out, they were STILL using that fucking machine.

I’m pissed at those people for hogging the machines, but I’m also annoyed that such a large gym only has one such machine available. I mean, they have at least ten ab-machines available, but only one lower back machine? Irritating….

The highlight though was being quizzed by some random dude on the meaning of daylight savings time. He was hot: t-shirt tucked into his shorts, glasses, and a buzz cut with a middle bald spot. Nothing against balding guys; there are plenty of sexy bald or balding men, but this guy? Not one of them. Oh, and he also complimented me on my form. I said thanks and finished my reps.

What sucks more? Getting up at 7am on a Saturday, or realizing that on Sunday, you’ll get up a whole hour later than usual because of daylight savings time?

What a worthless piece of fucking shit….

Our new “coinless” washing machines were installed for our apartments last week. At last, after six months of construction, we have more than two crappy washers for our entire complex.

I went downstairs tonight, Saturday night, and no one was washing clothes. “Great,” I thought. I have the whole lot of them to myself.

When I went to add money to my laundry card, I got this message.

No dial tone. Please try again later.

WTF? Why must you mock me like this? Why? What have I done? I just want clean underwear and a fresh towel. Why are you making it so hard?

Maybe I’ll get a tub and a scrub-board, sit on my porch, and hand-wash my clothes while singing hymns.

*grrrr…piece of shit*

Riddle me this batman: Why does our oven now control electrical output for three rooms in our apartment?

Last night, we preheated the oven in order to warm up some leftover pizza. We wondered what would happen if we broiled our pizza instead of baking it, so we turned the switch to broil. Then, the lights went out.

Danny went to the breaker box and flipped the switches. Still nothing. We knew the oven had something to do with it, so we started turning the knobs on it. When we hit “bake” the lights came on but not all the way. The fluorescent light in our kitchen began flickering and the lights in our living room came on partway. We had our very own “brown-out.” Yay.

Since it’s the weekend, I couldn’t get a hold of our new apartment manager. Considering that our old apartment manager was useless and snotty to boot, if this person just returns our phone call sometime tomorrow then I’ll be thrilled.

We don’t have enough current to power the TV, but our office and bedroom are getting enough juice to power our computers.

I think this situation is related to the fact that our apartment complex just installed a brand new laundry facility directly below our apartment. I really hope that they can fix the issue because I would like to wash clothes AND watch TV during the same day.

What is going on at the gym? Last night, I went there around 8:30pm and it was packed. Why is this happening? I thought the go-getters with new year’s resolutions like mine would have quit long ago. Maybe I just live in a “fit” neighborhood.

There is no chance of getting an elliptical machine in the evenings so I opt for weight lifting or swimming. Last week, the pool was full at 9pm. Whaaa?? Then last night the weights and lifting machines were packed and not just with burly men. I didn’t have to wait too long, but what the heck? C’mon people. Don’t you need to be at the store buying ice cream or renting DVDs? I need to get toned!

Okay, so maybe I actually do have a head cold as opposed to a reaction to my sinus meds. Suck. I stayed home today and have remained sniffly throughout. Poor me.

Staying home was fine though. I did laundry, pet the cats, watched oprah, and cooked supper.

later….

Supper was good, but now I feel worse than I did before. Ugh….head cold. Not fun.

It’s not just the handfuls of M&Ms I scarfed down that are making me feel a little, I don’t know, off. Tonight (okay, on Wed night because I’m a little behind) they eliminated Nick on ProjRun. Nick! Nooooo! I mean, he hasn’t done well for the last two weeks but he lost to a fucking space suit made of shredded t-shirts or something. Not only did Kara have to wear that brownish abortion on stage but Santino freakin’ LOVED it. Ugh…

Even though the judges keep liking Kara for some reason, I want her gone. She is spineless, weak, fragile, and boring! Even Santino has personality, a shitty personality, but personality all the same.

I’m just, feeling…unggghhhh…….